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Pterodactyl

by ME REX

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1.
Climbing a column of air that’s enclosed by the stairwell Up to the place where you’re living Within spitting distance One day we will be just like blood Hit the air and thicken up I will be there when your nose bleeds I will be there when you’re lonely And what hearty fruits will the dirt hold For you whenever you come home I will be carbon monoxide I’ll stick around ’til the cell dies I want my head on your shoulder for the whole rest of the drive But I’m scared that you’ll feel a bloody mind swelling up on the inside So if you fall, fall forwards When was the last time you saw her? I’ll be your paranoid choir boy Chaos that cradles the order I’ll be thicker than water I will be the wave that remains forever cresting, never graduates And it makes you feel like you are Back at school there will always Be an older truth conflicting with the new It’s easier just to invent, easier just to forget Reasons that it was all fucked up Reasons that it was just perfect Do you feel like you burn a hole Into every new place you go What we thought a seat of feeling It was just a pump Never a great bull muscle we ever bloodied up much Everything you ever did, you did for love Cannot shake the feeling you’ll never get enough An overreaction equal and opposing I don’t think I know anybody here that knows him Lowered expectations, party’s never over Choke the atmosphere down 3 nights in a row here Do you feel like you burn a
2.
Everyone but me is evil robots And the floor is made of lava and the walls are all closing up Don’t call me up ‘cause I don’t know what I can do to help you there’s no way of leaving this room But oh my god, filled with hatred Egg shell walkers, halo chasers Peace among the promise breakers Sinkholes underneath the pavement We’re your family all around you Proud of everything about you Feeling locked out, feeling lied to Truth you crossed out crucified you It’s like there’s a side to you we know and there’s a side to you we don’t But shame and terror, fear and hatred Coming down through generations Disintegration, disintegration Are you not graceful? Are you not patient? Are you not grateful now for the way you are? I hate the way they talk about you Smell in the air some old, burned out truth Like a prayer for when you’re scared Find no comfort anywhere Hold what heavy, hearty fruits the hungry dirt decides to return It seems like all you ever feel now are the holes torn in your future Everyone but me is evil robots And the floor is made of lava The walls are closing in to crush us Myles I can see the future screaming through the caterwaul Sometimes I see things getting better Sometimes I don’t see you here at all It’s like the ending of a past life I still share a skeleton with And this might take all of the courage you didn’t know you had to give But there are no one-shot redemptions It’s something that happens slowly Cried until you were out of breath Said nowadays it’s good to know me Everyone but me is evil robots And the floor is made of lava The walls are all closing up When it feels like Leaning on people always leads you straight to hurt Remember it was you that hung the moon up in my world
3.
The argument starts in my head and spreads out like a mold From weak spots in the ceiling down to the base of the wall And this place looks like a film set, a storage unit or a hospital bed But not like anywhere you really live It’s your old bedroom where you smoke like a car tyre On a pile of car tyre carcasses on a bonfire And I hyperventilate, hold my breath and fold my arms across my chest Push me down, push me down ‘Cause I like the way your name tastes in my mouth, I like the way your name tastes And it’s hard to start, it’s hard to start again Nought’s not a positive number, it’s just the sum of the game First you’re just filling the hours then you’re counting the days And every time the record breaks, the record breaks At the bleeding edge of history, carving its own way into you and me Building distance in our heads we cannot make manifest in our feet And there is something pressing its teeth deep into the exposed bare soles We barely feel it though, like skin, it itches when my body’s not clean Mind crawls, intrusive thoughts and violent fantasies It hurts a lot, it hurts a whole lot That’s why we laugh about it That’s why we don’t talk And you’re in the front seat, taking a phone call Tongue in your front teeth kept in a chokehold Filling the hour, I walk to your house the whole way I am cutting new ruts, I am carving new names Are you saving up all the shame on the inside? Going over the same old good time? Going over the same old good time Down, push me down ‘Cause I like the way your name tastes in my mouth I like the way your name tastes It hurts a lot, it hurts a whole lot That’s why we laugh about it That’s why we don’t talk We had a plan, this wasn’t it I thought we were accomplices We had some time, it all ran out I like the way your name tastes in my mouth
4.
From Noah’s ark to Ragnarok Svalbard to atlantis There has always been a part of us that sleeps right through the rampage But I have seen satan hiding behind the moon I have seen the giant sleeping inside of you Stay up ’til we’re bloodshot just watching TV Waiting for the sky to bite back down on you and me Parade around, parade around We are so brave, we are so proud If we wake up scared tomorrow we will let this house burn down, down, down That was us, the wasted kids The railway bridge above Singing “blessed is the sedative, forever in my blood” It says “Myles the light is wherever you find it Myles it makes no fucking difference I am the only god you’ve got left now So beg for my forgiveness” There will be no more wildest dreams There will be no more secret wishes When you finally see the glory that will be revealed within us I bear offerings in blood and sick In all my sacred nakedness I will show you famous places on The bodies we are escaping from ‘Cause I do this thing when I get scared I clench my teeth, empty my lungs of air I don’t blame you, it’s not your fault We’re just waiting for the lightning bolt I want to burn your silhouette into the ground around my feet And let that savage incandescence carve its own way into me I know that you get beaten up by ghosts in your sleep You wake up without bruises and climb to your feet I don’t know for you how hard it is, we’re all proud of you regardless Sink or swim, mess it up or fuck it all and cut and run Cut and run I have these magic spells for my mental health They only show me brittle bits of truth And it’s somehow still a lonely ritual If you want to lick the common wound It’s easy to invent It’s easy to forget Reasons it’s fucked up Reasons it’s perfect You had your heart set On kicking the doors down How quickly can I get Over to your house I want to embody uncomplicated goodness The kind you only find in gods and strangers But all our past is part of us Even the pieces we’re ashamed of And it’s hard enough Loving anyone You never came out Totally blameless And all our past Is part of us Even the pieces that We’re all ashamed of

credits

released February 4, 2022

All songs by ME REX:

Myles McCabe - vocals, guitar, keyboards
Kathryn Woods - vocals, guitar
Phoebe Cross - vocals, drums
Rich Mandell - vocals, bass

Additional vocals by Sophie Mackenzie and Dexter Bush
Additional Trumpet by Danny Lester

Recorded at Resident Studios
Produced and mixed by Rich Mandell
Mastered by Tom Woodhead at Hippocratic Mastering

Artwork by Sophie Mackenzie

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